**Said in a slurred voice***
"I'd lllllike to introduuuce you to my lill' frrriend.
I must say. I felt humiliated, red-in-the-face, not to mention extremely red-necked when I tip-toed up to the counter of the Spirits department of Hy..Vee. Just moments before I had hidden a huge jug of vod.ka underneath the pam.pers in my shopping cart hoping that no one I knew would catch me with straight up alcohol in my cart. I peeked above the bottles and sneaked around corners praying that my pastor wouldn't be in the health food section where he could get a very clear view of me purchasing the biggest bottle of liquor I could find.
What kind of mom am I anyway? I have my almost-four-year-old son holding my hand, walking along side the cart singing "Old McDonald" and my 11 month old little girl with an adorable pink bow in her hair clapping and laughing at her brother as I'm traipsing up to the counter with a bottle, let me rephrase that, jug of, shhh, dare I say it?....vod.ka! Oh, Lord. Please forgive me.
Most of you who know me really well know that this whole scenario is out of the ordinary for me. And, truly, it is. Until now. I read that vod.ka is the BEST cleaning product that you can use that is totally environmentally safe, antibacterial and scent free. And, again, for most of you who know me real well, you know that I am a clean f-r-e-a-k. So, with a lump in my throat, I purchased the cheapest, biggest jug of vod.ka you can buy and after I tried it, I think it's safe to say that I LOVE vod.ka. My potties and sinks haven't ever had such a shine.
Ahhh...the tricks of the trade. The tricks of happiness to me. So, from today forward, I introduce you to "Man that Works? Mondays". All the cleaning "Wows" and "Reallys?" you could ever want. Tune in every Monday to see if I have something that may just work for you too. And, of course, if I see you in the Spirits department of Hy..Vee. I'll simply smile and wave.